The gift of admitting that sometimes you suck.
Last weekend I spend a glorious couple of days with a fellow coach who also happens to be one of my favorite people in the world.
We went to museums and galleries. She let me drag her to a book store and we bought shiny new journals. We went to some lovely restaurants and ate delicious food.
But most of the time we just talked.
About pretty much everything.
And something that really struck me was how different friendships are when you allow yourself to be open about the parts of your life where you feel like you suck!
I can remember many friendships that felt strained because I was always trying to impress the other person... because I believed I wasn't good enough to be their friend.
So many conversations where I was terrified of saying the wrong thing and would spend WAY too much time obsessing over things that I did say and how stupid I thought they were.
I was always terrified to share how I really felt about things, how I felt about myself, and what I struggled with because all of it was just proof that I was a mess.
A disaster.
Worthless.
Unloved.
It's hard to truly connect with people when you spend all your time hiding who you are (or think you are!) from them.
I remember realizing once that of COURSE people didn't love me... how could they?
They didn't even know me.
The gift we receive when we allow ourselves to be honest about where we feel like we suck, is freedom… and true connection with others.
Because as it turns out NO ONE resonates with perfection.
This weekend as I told my friend about the fears I have in my business, the insecurities about my body that still come up, the frustrations I have in my relationship with my husband...
all the things I would have hidden from people before because I was terrified that they meant I was failing at life.
I was reminded constantly of just how liberating it is to be able to say,
YES I AM HUMAN.
Yes, I have fears.
Yes, sometimes I struggle and I suck at things.
Yes, I screw up.
and...
it's actually ok.
Because these things are just experiences I'm working through. Phases of my growth. Shit that happens.
